A Thought For All Women Just Beginning...

My favorite quote from Margaret Thatcher.

While my last post was high on the fun side of things, I have to say my thoughts are a little more deep at the moment. Perhaps with my 25th birthday fast approaching within these next few days I find myself considering more the feelings that stay with me most often.

In all of my life, I have been blessed to know a great many people- some as friends, some as family, and some as acquaintances. Of everyone, it is without a doubt the women that I have come to know the most. Oh, the lessons I have learned...far too many for one post. Mainly there has been my mother. Without her guidance, I could never have made sense of the nonsense, or seen past the mess, or learned to consider and treasure all that matters most.

My mother didn't raise me with a slap to the hand when I was wrong and a strong scolding. She seemed to find every moment to matter; every thing worth conversation. When she was telling me family stories or lessons others had learned it was never enough to simply tell the story. She included the feelings, the thoughts, the wrongs, and rights of every instance. From those stories, and from what I myself saw over time, I learned that every woman has the ability to choose and the ability to think no matter what. Of these two things, these two very great gifts, she can either help or hurt.

While my life time is not one of truly great length or importance, I would like to think that it has had its moments of value. Say what you will, but in the end those that cause nothing but grief and pain are sadly hard to miss. I am sorry to say that in my time alone I have known more women than I would ever care to know who see their bodies as their only tool and their minds filled with great skill. I have seen enough fake tears for a private pond (but am told together there may be enough for a great ocean). I have faced enough fake smiles to make me cringe, and heard so many voices filled with fake sympathy, kindness, and adoration that it has made my skin crawl more than once.

Beginning to regret that you are a woman yet? Wait just a minute. For all of the bad that exist (and it does exist), there are a handful of women nearby using their every breath for the good of others. They may seem few and far between, but I know a few myself. One in particular shines above them all. (I would say it even if she were not my mother.) I could tell you of how she listens to everyone, is the most frugal woman I know, how she smiles, or how she laughs. I could tell you everything I have ever known about my mother, but at the end of the day the thing that makes the difference, the part of her that makes everything about her so different and of such value is this- my mother is genuine. When she talks to you or smiles at you or even interacts with you, it isn't for show. If she seems like she cares, it is because she does. If she seems tough, it is because she is. If she seems like someone you shouldn't mess with, you probably shouldn't. (And if the later, who did you mess with to bring out that side?) I know for a fact that my mother makes an impact on at least 4 other people in her life every day. Truth is though, I know she has made an impact, and makes an impact, on so many others.

My mother has been given so many positions in life, and she has held them all with love. She helps those around her with her choices and her decisions. I have to recognize now that I have the ability to do the same. We all do. If you want to stop and consider how special you are as a woman, think of it this way? What type of woman are you? Do you only lend a hand when others see, or do you try to when no one else is looking? Do you use the confidence of others against them, or is their trust of value to you? Forgetting your position as daughter, sister, wife, niece, granddaughter, cousin, friend, to a stranger do you think you are ever able to make a difference or ever can?

I wish I could say that with all of my mother's advice that I never fail. I wish I could say I am always giving, always considerate, always selfless. Unfortunately that is just not always the case. I have a tendency to let my own wants get in the way sometimes or to let my own irritation or hurt distract me from being considerate of others. In 25 years I am far from perfection. Still, it is something to live for. It is something to strive for and remember every day. It puts a little hope in my voice, a little skip in my heartbeat, to remember the responsibility and the choices I have to make. Let's face it, God didn't make us to sit idly, or to be wife or a friend just so we can flaunt it, or a mother just so we can brag about the pain we endured in labor. He didn't give us the ability to think all so we could think constantly of how to make trouble.

Whether you be newlywed or single, I ask you to consider with me what type of woman you are. Like it or not, what type of woman do you want to be? Titles aren't enough to define you as a woman (wife, mother, sister, friend, etc.). It is our character that makes the difference; not only in our life, but in the lives of others.

P.S. Considering the busy summer, I am extending Operation Christmas Card until September 15th. Please, if you have not considered participating stop by the page at the top. One of our troops could receive a very special Christmas card from you this Christmas.